Crescent Moon

Under the tree i stand,
Looking at the people moving around,
Going on with the life of theirs,
Lost in the dreams of their life.

I just stand there , quietly , silently,
Occasionally , smiling & waving at someone i may know,
Trying to figure out ,
Why i am here & not there,
With the rest ,
Living life as it happens.

Everything i think is like the thoughts of a third person,
Secondhand emotions,
Passed down opinions,
My head feels like a blank canvas,
Trying to decide which paints I want,
Out of the millions I see.

Some people stop occasionally,
Asking how am I,
What am I doing ,
Or something else about me,
I smile & say just bored,
Looking for something interesting.

I want to go with them,
Laugh more then a few minutes,
Trust more then when they see,
Shed tears instead of them welling up & staying in my eyes,
But I can’t figure out how,
To let go & have someone come close.

I look up from the shade,
I see you sitting under the tree, 
On top of hill, 
The breeze ruffling you hair ,
A serene smile playing on your lips,
& I think  are you happy,
Or is the smile fake?

Perhaps feeling my stare, 
You look down, 
Right at me,
Showing that the smile reaches your eyes,
I stare back ,
With a blank look on my face.

I want to be close,
To someone ,anyone,
Everyone who passed by,
Had someone with them ,
I felt kinda insecure,
Asking how do I open ,
To anyone at all,
Afraid they won’t understand ,
How I feel alone & bit lonely.

Perhaps because you were alone too,
Or that you looked so content,
Sitting there alone,
I got the courage to go ,
and ask you how.

I go & sit beside you,
We look at the scenery in front of us,
The city with people milling around,
Dotted by parks & trees,
Wind playing with the leaves,
And as sun goes down,
The light playing hide & seek.

I thought I would ask you,
But I don’t,
A few minutes can’t end,
Years of my self doubt.
So we just talk,
About anything we can think of.

Weird at times,crazy at others,
About sane & insane topics alike,
We talk about without batting an eye,
Not on perfect frequency,
Nor reflection of the other,
We just talk,
With true opinions of ours.

For hours we have been talking,
Without realising the time,
We get up dusting our jeans,
Taking the grass out of our clothing,
Smile at each other,
& walk down the hill.

Goodbyes not really fitting,
So we just wave,
& walk on our ways.
I don’t know,
When we will meet again,
But I know we will,
However long it might take.

As I walk under the street light ,
I halt suddenly,
Realising I haven’t asked him the question yet,
An owl’s hoot makes me look up,
And I laugh out loud.

For I see the crescent moon,
It ain’t perfect,
It has spots,
Nor is it complete,
& so is my life.

I saw him on the hill,
Though I didn’t ask him,
How do I open,
I did speak ,
With my  true feelings,
Not with some commentary,
About how I should feel.

I did not let him in,
But I gave him a glimpse,
For I am a crescent moon,
Yet to be full,
Beautiful am gonna be,
Despite the imperfections you see.

just smile^_^

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